I don’t know why this happens but I’m sure that im the the only woman that this happens to…
Lemme set the scene real quick…
Ladies, it’s 2am and you get that phone call from your booski that he is about to come through, you hang up the phone and jump right in the shower, making sure errything is looking good and smellin nice. You make sure you brush ya teeth, sprayed on ya fav perfume right before slippin into that “make a nigga say oowweee” lingerie number you just brought for those “just in case he shows up outta nowhere like now” type situation, (sidenote to the guys: yes, we have those in our drawers or closets, they may be hiden behind the monday, tuesday,wednesday panties in the back..smh) ANYWAYS…so you get all dolled up and hella sexy and answer the door looking too fyne but not tryin to make it obvious that you know what you look like (frontin like you just woke up outta bed to answer the door, Beyonce..stopppp it!) Sooo, you two, whatever you do for that night, eventually end up cuddling, OK this is where shit LITERALLY gets real for me…for I am a…
NIGHT POOTER!!!
Yes, I admit it! I am not proud of it and its crazy because it always happens whenever I cuddle with fyneeee ass men, I don’t know if its my nerves or what but im ashamed to say that it has once gone even so far as me and my boo( a new boo, like a few months in the game) having some nice pillow talk in bed while spooning and all of a sudden my booty decided that it wanted to be a part of the convo too, out of nowhere, I POOTED ON HIM YALL,smh. It completely slipped out at crackhead speed…Im talkin bout, slipped right pass my booty censors! My booty muscle defence line had no chance, this shit meant business!
Lucky for me, I was acting goofy and moving around in his arms while making alot of noise when it happened but I KNOOOW he felt the impact of wind against thigh, I KNOW HE DID! He didn’t say anything about it though, fast forward, tell me why the hell I spent the whole night going in and out of my room, into the living room, just to pass gas, after that slip up, I was so afraid to sleep that night. LOL It was terrible, I was soooo tired the next day at school, end up falling alseep in the car. SMFH
Each time its something worse, now I have a phoebia, maybe I should just start dating ugly men?? Hmm, I dunno.
Anyways, to all of the women out there, does this happen to you too or am I just an innocent victim of a very RUDE ASS?? What is the most embrassing thing that has every happened to you in front of a guy and how did you play that shit off? (sidenote, one of my homegirls told me that she once farted in front of a guy by mistake and blamed it on his dog…#savingface) Haha.
Anyways, leave a comment below and lemme know what’s up…
S/O to all of my night pooters out there!!!
#TeamLooseBooty
Besitos XxXxX
Tylo ❤